It is natural for humans to betray themselves.. pfft..

They do not know me very well.. but not.. they only know whats outside of me.. but not inside.. none understands my true potential.. none know my true feeling.. i had enough of believeing..

there's a saying friendship last forever.. but no.. there was always greed and pride in them.. betrayers.. curses.. i shouldnt have believe in them.. i gave up socializing because of that.. i never trust people from that on.. i give hope to only one i could trust but then he also turn his back on me.. argh.. the pain of hoping to someone who could heal my hate and prove that im wrong.. but i was right.. it was our nature to betray ourselves.. the face of disappointment.. even the one that i loved was taken from me.. i couldnt do the inevitable.. i was destined to suffer spiritually and emotionally.. i was once so full of loved and now replaced by hate... my hate grows more and more.. i am feeding my own hate.. That's when I learned... that HUMANS are the lowest beings in the world.. That I can't rely on or believe in them.. HOPE only leads to DISAPPOINTMENT.. If you believe in others eventually they will BETRAY you.. Thus, one should not have HOPE in the first place..

every night.. my mind is always tortured of my previous past.. i always remorse every moment i remember.. i hated myself.. i regret that i was born..

i still have friends.. but i dont know how will they last long.. should i believe on them? No.. i dont think so.. i've been betrayed many times that i already lost counting on it.. i'll just let it be.. it is always inevitable.. i want to be immune to it.. i dont want to be disappointed anymore.. to love again? i dont think so.. love failed me.. hate only keeps me alive and strong.. i've been alone for sometime.. and yet my will is still standing..

i still move on.. thou i still drag my burden along with me.. i still stand strong against them.. dont know why.. but this soul will fight to the last.. some people change some dont.. some miracle happens.. and whenever that comes.. i humbly accept my fate..

Give me 2 years for this and i may regret this message again.. hehe